Chris McCarthy’s Lobster Totals Are Under Review

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You’ve heard of plyometrics, you’ve heard of sabermetrics, well now folks Chris McCarthy is apparently applying Fudge-o-metrics in counting his lobster totals for the year.

Huge controversy in the lobster totals and calculations from shady unscrupulous pooping dog owner Chris McCarthy have led to a full scale investigation. Everything is under review. EVERYTHING!

Roger Goodell and Brett Cavanaugh have been called in to get to the bottom and find a just ruling.

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